why do serial cheaters want to stay married

t to say, they know how to say it, and how to carry themselves so that their body language doesn't give away a lie. No wins for the other woman, and 23 it is for you and your husband! For instance, if someone is in an environment where cheating happens a lot, they may be more encouraged to cheat. So SR to answer your question. I would ask him point blank if there is any reason for her to be continuing to pursue this so aggressively. Ohhh and then she would go psycho, because of course he wouldnt turn his phone off for her, I must have done something to him. Id be gone, settled and almost a year into getting my life in order. They say that in the fire, the gold is separated from the dross. I bet she is lovely and I would like to say hello. So, he sheepishly brought me over to his wife (who was in another part of the complex with her female friend) and I chatted with her, ignoring him, talking about mom stuff, and making it subtly known that I am not a threat. I hate to say it, but with my H I have to be very firm with no chance of ambiguity on my part. Serial cheaters are exactly what their title . Now books like Quiet are coming out and I have noticed that companies are starting to specifically look for qualities that are most commonly found in introverts. Of course, at the time I did not know he was cheating on me in fact, I had to hear it from a third party 6 weeks after he broke up with me and I had moved out. These needs may be sexual or emotional. Ultimately, we can only predict what a person might do, rather than know with 100% what they will do. How did he find these suppliers. Very respectful, church going, seemed normal. He also may feel like a failure and fear everyone else thinking the same. . He has a lot of natural compassion for people, no matter who they are. Here are the common traits of a serial cheater: Sociopathic attitudes: Constant disregard for rules; lacks guilt and remorse when caught doing something harmful. This leads to a lot of shame from society. Ever hear of hyper bonding? Yes parking lot ass kicking she will understand. This leads to resentment and seeking affection elsewhere. Ohhh really, well this man has just been separated from his wife and she starts having an affair with you, wtf, what do you expect this man to do and say to her, while his emotions are running high. If you are over him none of that stuff matters. "They can look you in the eye and say things such as: What a long day at work,' when they were actually with another person. Your ex-AP is an irrelevant human being in terms of your life and you need to put #1 first. What it boils down to is opportunity, lack of personal moral code, and a great talent for lies, manipulation and entitlement. Blame their exes way too much. (She is, by the way, a lovely woman and cute as a button). Think twice about giving a second chance when: Your partner had an affair with an ex-partner. "These are lies, of course, so that when they are not with you, they have a great story to draw from.". He knew the lay of the land at the job, he knew how to charm circles around his co-workers, he knew what made each of them tick and he used it to his best advantage. So if you notice that your partner is very into themselves, that's a red flag to keep in mind. I have put together a list of attitudes and behaviors that are commonly found in those who are likely to be unfaithful multiple times. A Tale of Two Cheaters: Are You Married to a Serial Cheater? All too often, respect is the one crucial thing that is constantly . Lol. You may even become your own detective, going through his phone, emails, pockets, and online activities. Its like they are always just one drink, or hit, or whatever away. "Calling out the wrong name in the heat of passion is a faux pas that's hard to backpedal," Winter explained, while pet names are easy to remember. So here are some habits serial cheaters are more likely to have than one-time cheaters. If he didnt want to talk to the ow, he would turn his phone off. She was very smart and cunning with how she played him, she fed him her sob stories, and then he thought she was such a poor thing, she knew he would start telling her things. Why do serial cheaters want to STAY MARRIED even after confrontation Thankyou the I think we have all learned that lesson, I am sure we all need to make sure we dont waste what we have learned. After a while, you literally dont feel bad about it. Re-Think your shit before you write it. Now all of us here have decided for one reason or another to continue to leave our wagons hooked to people who obviously have deep character flaws. The very act of sneaking around may also excite them. I agree with your h, 23 NOT 21. The rest of the details that you provide indicate the typical predator/prey dynamic that narcissists thrive on. As for that woman who reported to you and was trying to get your husbands attention. I had sent it via email. I often wonder what my H OW thinks now that the affair is over, they no longer communicate and he is back home with is seemingly horrible wife. One-time cheaters are less likely to view cheating as a way to get an adrenaline rush. My inlaws avoid me since Im a cold bitch who wont go to funerals etc, nor do my kids want to go. Top 12 Helpful Tricks, What Makes A Girl Jealous Of Another Girl? He also may recognize how great the marriage is overall and he doesnt want to let go of that. You are a good person, dont ever think your not, and dont ever think your not deserving of a happy marriage with your h, because you are. looking back, I think I was probably just a cute girl with a nice body who was an easy lay. WHAT a great British word!!! Im sure she was trying to move in on him. First I would start with a conversation with my husband. How long should I wait to text after being left on read? According to a 2010 to 2017 General Social Survey issued by the Institute for Family Studies, 20% of men and 13% of women have had sex with someone who was not their spouse while married. I also keep A LOT close to my chest. "They are invested in the . Amen. Here's Why Serial Cheaters Keep On Cheating, According To Science Everyone seemedclose. New job etc not helping! By the way, and earlier comment you made struck a chord with me and a light-bulb went on in my head. You make a very good point. If he uses them frequently, his better judgment has taken a very long sabbatical and it wont be returning anytime soon. Im addicted to it but it kind of keeps so much that I want to let go, front-of-mind, and sometimes I question if Im hindering or helping my recovery! 7 Things To Note If You Have A Cheating Partner, How To Cope With Anxiety After Husbands Affair, How to Combat the 5 Glaring Effects of Anxiety After Infidelity. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. As they say, fool me once, shame on you. Thinking About Staying With a Cheater? Read This First Once he saw me, he was covered in guilt, and must have thought that he was in too deep to ever think I would want to keep him. What a good thing you did, apologising and informing her that you are not a threat to her marriage, and that she has nothing yo fear, you will not be contacting her h again. Without those sob stories they know they are nothing more than feral dogs and the relationship is pointless. Good point now I need to convince my husband to stop being a people pleaser and fearing offending everyone. Surprisingly, cheating is so common that it is sometimes hard to separate infidelity and serial adultery.. How to Tell a Cheater from a Sex Addict - Psych Central One-time cheaters may give you gifts in an effort to help make things right. I walked out of his office and left the job later that day (wed had to continue working together whilst Id worked my notice but we didnt talk for 4 months and hed been away in a recovery place for 5 weeks of that). He continues to cheat. He had nothing to lose. I raise virtual champagne glasses in celebration: may what happened during those two years be only a tiny blip on the radar of a healthy, long-lived, loving, and fruitful life together. It does not store any personal data. To understand why people serially cheat, it's important to take note of what our collective definition of cheating is. They may be more willing to put their relationships on the line. The girlfriend of a married narcissist will hear a myriad of excuses for why he hasn't gone through with a divorce, all based around plausible deniability . Thankyou very much Doug, I think my h has come a long way, since dday. "Your partner doesn't want you to see their private activity, and therefore is purposefully excluding you from a vital portion of their lives." So for a married man to carry on in front of the whole office would just disgust me. So you have a fellow introvert here on EAJ as well as a southerner. I really appreciate your input. When you reach out, you get no reply or told they'll get right back to you which they don't," Wish explained. I replied I wish she would . Reason 1: You teach people how to treat you. Still, it is so unbelievable to me that women like the one you hired/fired actually exist. Your Hs affair partner sounds very intentionally vicious, manipulative, selfish, and heartless. We still have some recovery work to do, I still am so very embarrassed about what happened, but I think the ow can be more embarrassed about chasing a married man, trying to break a family, and not letting go of him when he made a decision to stay with his family. In the history of the world, it hasnt happened. I have found over my 4+ decades that I am unusual, complex and unique. Zeynep Yenisey. I also prefer alone time, despise talking on the phone & texting, would rather listen than talk, love to read, cook, garden, watch movies by myself. For her crap. We took photos of the beautiful suite we were in, and I posted them on fb, lol. I have let him know before how he attracts these types, but he is genuinely naive about this because he is just being himself.

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